Yesterday through this morning I was a tyrant. I will admit my stress over projects for school had taken over. Especially regarding my Communist Ballet paper…. I felt I was so immersed in it I couldn’t clearly write my topic. Slowly sleep deprivation and resentment towards my inability to write clouded me even further.
God has continued to give me grace when I am stressed. I’m truly thankful to people who can love me at my worst. When I am stressed, and when I doubt myself, and when I make bad choices because of that.
Recently I have been feeling my brokenness and the brokenness of this world. Sometimes there’s not a perfect way to do something. My perfectionism says there must be. But I know my ways will always be less than perfect.
But if I am vulnerable about my shortcomings then I see grace. It’s not that grace extended is dependent on us. But it is as if we are crouched on the ground with our head facing down. A shadow appears over us. And we know that should we look into the eyes of another being we will lose face. All the pain inside may coming tumbling over in the form of tears… We can ignore the figure above us. We can turn to anger. Or we can let the tears roll and allow ourselves to be touched with Grace.